Redbeard the Great — Razor Wire Feels

Bio / Story

My name is Nicolas Losito. Inside, they call me Redbeard the Great — though the alias has had other forms. It started as a joke. I was teaching myself card tricks in my cell in late 2020, and I thought: every good magician needs a name. Redbeard the Great. Coincidence? I think not.

"Out in the real world, I'm a junkie fuckup. In here, apparently I'm one of the smart ones. People come to me for wisdom and insight and fun facts."
— 11/23/20

Starting in 2017, I wrote letters home from inside NCDAC. Those letters became a memoir — Razor Wire Feels — 52 episodes across 5 parts. When they gave us tablets in 2021, the letters became texts. The format changed; the voice didn't. Each episode ends the same: "This has been another episode of Razor Wire Feels, I'm your host, Redbeard the [fill in the blank]."

During the pandemic I used my COVID stimulus check to draw K-Master K & The Hammer: Issue #0, 26 pages. In 2022 I founded Bich Fist Comics (yes, spelled exactly like that — in reference to BC Rich Bich guitars) as the publishing arm. I also finished a short story, The Ravaged, 17 handwritten pages, second draft final. And I have a son, Mason, who at age 6 saw a picture of me for the first time and told his mom — proudly — "My Dad comes home from prison next year."

This page is mine. It is also the template for everyone inside who deserves one.

Known aliases, in order of appearance:

the Wise the Regressor the Capitalist the Poet the Intolerant the Cannabalisticly Inclined the Paranoid the Astronomer ✦ final

Writing

Artwork

All Posts

Part V — Getting Out · 2022–2023

Redbeard the Astronomer

October 26, 2023

Final Episode

C-Lizzle Mainizzle — Greetings from the Dungeon

The last letter. The hole again. In his final weeks. No phone, no coffee, no sunlight. Contains a full mathematical inquiry into the exact size of a dick required to choke the sun, conducted in dialogue with a CO who Googled it and came back an hour later. "This has been the final incarcerated episode of Razor Wire Feels. See you soon Cuz. (a.o.T.D over)"

Redbeard the Paranoid

March 30, 2023

Writing

Squeaky Pip — Solitary Confinement is the Catalyst

Back in the hole on protective custody. A stranger he'd never met walked up and handed him a freshly sharpened pencil, said he seemed like a good dude. He knew immediately what it meant. He could hear someone coaching someone else to aim for his carotid artery under his ear. He chose life. "Respect from a bunch of criminals isn't gonna pay my bills or raise my son. I'm coming home."

Redbeard the Great

November 14, 2022

Digital

Mason

His son, age 6, had never seen a picture of him. His mom was showing Mason photos on her phone. He saw one and asked who that was. She said: that's your dad, he comes home from prison next year. Mason looked at his mom and said proudly: "My Dad comes home from prison next year." His baby mama was furious. He wrote: "I'm proud of the kid for being proud of me coming home from prison."

Redbeard the Great

September 8, 2022

Digital

Bich Fist Comics — Founded

Starting a comic book company with K-Master K. Calling it Bich Fist Comics. Yes, spelled exactly like that. In reference to BC Rich Bich guitars. Already drew the logo. Purpose: to publish the comic, and then: "If you want to write some comics or anything for that matter I will publish it. Who says we can't publish books too."

Part IV — Pandemic Inside · 2020–2021

Redbeard the Great

March 27, 2022

Grief

The Breaking Bad Letter — Mary Beth & Nate

He tried to watch the Breaking Bad episode where Jesse's girlfriend chokes on her vomit. He couldn't get through it. His body went into a full panic attack — hyperventilation, shaking, had to lie on the floor. "That's how Mary Beth went out. Alone in her apartment. That's how Nate went out. Alone in his room. And both of them are people I introduced to this seductively numbing personal form of Hell."

Redbeard the Great

December 4, 2021

Digital

The Ravaged — Finished

17 handwritten pages. Second draft done; second draft is final. Mailing it out this week. A short story about fire, suicide as choice vs. necessity, the nature of reality, and a narrator losing his grip — written entirely in the first person as a letter to the reader. "I let a few people read it and they all really really liked it. And I quote — 'Yo that shit was like that!'"

Redbeard the Cannabalisticly Inclined

November 4, 2021

Digital

BTBAM, Vegan Toddlers, and the Transition to Digital

First digitized episode. On Between the Buried and Me's Automata I — "Everything they do stretches the boundaries, yet still is cordoned within their borders." On veganism. On being top of the food chain. Ends: "Could totally go for a couple vegan toddler shish kabobs right now. No relish, please, I'm not in a pickled mood."

Redbeard the Regressor

December 12, 2020

Writing

The Birth of Redbeard the Great

Guards shook down the block and took everything — 40 pairs of socks, 10 pants, 14 boxers. He goes on language regressing to cave paintings, the origin of milk, cannibalism as the first science. Then: teaching himself card tricks, 1–2 hours a day. "Already have my Magician name picked out — Redbeard the Great. Coincidence? I think not."

Redbeard the Wise

November 26, 2020 — Thanksgiving

Writing

Gobble Gobble Motherfuckers

Thanksgiving on lockdown. The prison radio played Alice's Restaurant at the exact moment they slid his tray under the door. COVID outbreak — 166.75 hours a week trapped in the cell. One slice of turkey that thick. "We came out more in the hole."